I found a rose today. It was wrapped in toilet paper, and placed in the gap where a book usually sits on my bookshelf. It was completely flat and dried out. It was also so dark that it looked a purplish black.
That rose has been there for about six months. I put it there after I went on the Cape Of Good Hope Chrysalis flight, because I never wanted the memories to fade. But, over time, I forgot that it was even there. It took a chance event, my mother borrowing that precise book, to bring the flower to light. I have read the books it was between enough that I had no plans to reread them soon, and so without that event, the rose would have remain undiscovered. Possibly becoming drier and flatter.
Sometimes that is what walking with God is like. We discover something important, and so we tuck it away in our memories, somewhere safe, where we can preserve it. Make sure that it will last forever. But then, we have put it away so safely that we do not think of it again, until a chance event brings it to our attention. This rose was not completely forgotten, and I have other reminders of Chrysalis, but the state in which I found it, and the way in which I found it, are meaningful.
The black rose has many strong and dark connotations. But this rose was a beautiful red specimen when I received it. Now, I could call it black and brittle, and say it is dying, or I could say it is dark purple, and well preserved. It will not rot, instead I will be able to keep it forever, although I should probably label it if I want to remember where it came from. The chance of finding it, depended on someone else wanting to read a particular book on my shelf. One that most of the time doesn't even feature on my "recommend to people" list. Yet it was borrowed, and the rose was brought to light.
My thoughts on this? God works in weird and wonderful ways, and nothing is ever a coincidence. Instead it is a God-incidence.
Showing posts with label Christianity. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Christianity. Show all posts
Saturday, 31 January 2015
Monday, 7 July 2014
Working for God
Oh, look, its been about a month since my last post. You know what else? I have just had blog-worthy stuff happening in my life. It's kinda weird how that can happen. Maybe I'm subconsciously saving everything up for a monthly release into the world. It could happen, right? But never mind that, I don't want to right a post about what's happening in my head, instead I want to share what's been happening in my life.
I think I mentioned in my last post that I was going to be embarking on an internship, well I did. I spent two weeks working in a finance area. There were five of us in the internship, two with computer science backgrounds, and three who are studying finance. We arrived nervous and unsure of what to expect. By lunch on Day one, we knew what we had to do, and we knew that it would be a lot of hard work. Essentially, for those who know about pension funds, we had to hedge two different types of annuities in two weeks. We were given tons of assumptions we could make, and told of some simplifications which actually caused issues later on, but we all learned loads. I picked up a feel foe financial stuff that I never expected to have, which I'm sure will serve me very well in the future, and I learned quite a bit about working with a brand new team of people.
Overall the internship was good. But there were some troubling things. One, the pressure we were under. It was unreal. It was also mostly self imposed, or rather group imposed. I didn't like it, but we worked insane hours (in my opinion) and had limited rewards for that. I didn't even work the worst hours of the lot. Another, and it's a rather funny small thing, but I got sick. Probably because of working really hard and not being able to send a sick team mate home because of time restrictions.
After the internship though, is when things get really interesting. I had the opportunity to attend a Chrysalis flight. A weekend of such love, and intensity as I have never felt. They say it is a once in a lifetime experience, and I can understand why. If it wasn't, I think young people would be flooding the flights, and the experience would end up watered down. So, briefly, what is a Chrysalis flight?
A Chrysalis flight is kind of a "young people's version" of the Walk to Emmaus. Based on the transformation of a caterpillar to a butterfly, by spending time in a cocoon or chrysalis. This is a three day camp where young people are immersed in God's love, having to rely on others for everything, and so learning to let go of there lives. It is a time to truly experience that God is love, and a time to grow closer to God through study. Surrounded by an international community of prayer, the caterpillars are so soaked in prayer that it is surprising we do not end up saturated. That community offers support beyond the three day walk, allowing the butterflies who emerge to grow further in relationship with one another and Christ.
On this weekend I discovered that I am not as alone in my situation as I have often felt. I have met others who are in the same kind of place as me, and who are the same kind of age as me. It is this that truly made Chrysalis for me. That sense of never actually being alone has touched many lives over the years, and this weekend people shared with us what it meant to them, so inspiring us to share with others. I feel that I did indeed grow in my journey with Christ, and in the spirit of the title of this blog, I think I can share that I felt that two things I really needed to leave at the cross with Jesus were my pride and my fear of rejection. How well I will do at actually leaving them behind me I do not know, but with Jesus I believe I can overcome then, and live my life more fully in the hands and plans of God.
For all I speak of the joy that Chrysalis was (and I loved every moment, even when tired) there is a problem. After any type of high, be it chemical, spiritual, or emotional, there will always come a crash. For me that came when I returned home, and started having to deal with real life again. Being sick, and completely losing my voice make small things seem worse. Trying to respond to all my email, and make sure that I don't miss anything important. Catching up to varsity stuff once again, after ignoring it for a while. Having administrative errors on my side, coming from past mistakes, and things being in my calendar wrongly. All of these things were no easier to deal with for having been connected solely to God over the weekend. But I rest assured in his love for me. That no matter how bad things may seem, in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.
I have been called. I'm not sure where yet, but God has a plan, and I want to follow that plan.
I think I mentioned in my last post that I was going to be embarking on an internship, well I did. I spent two weeks working in a finance area. There were five of us in the internship, two with computer science backgrounds, and three who are studying finance. We arrived nervous and unsure of what to expect. By lunch on Day one, we knew what we had to do, and we knew that it would be a lot of hard work. Essentially, for those who know about pension funds, we had to hedge two different types of annuities in two weeks. We were given tons of assumptions we could make, and told of some simplifications which actually caused issues later on, but we all learned loads. I picked up a feel foe financial stuff that I never expected to have, which I'm sure will serve me very well in the future, and I learned quite a bit about working with a brand new team of people.
Overall the internship was good. But there were some troubling things. One, the pressure we were under. It was unreal. It was also mostly self imposed, or rather group imposed. I didn't like it, but we worked insane hours (in my opinion) and had limited rewards for that. I didn't even work the worst hours of the lot. Another, and it's a rather funny small thing, but I got sick. Probably because of working really hard and not being able to send a sick team mate home because of time restrictions.
After the internship though, is when things get really interesting. I had the opportunity to attend a Chrysalis flight. A weekend of such love, and intensity as I have never felt. They say it is a once in a lifetime experience, and I can understand why. If it wasn't, I think young people would be flooding the flights, and the experience would end up watered down. So, briefly, what is a Chrysalis flight?
A Chrysalis flight is kind of a "young people's version" of the Walk to Emmaus. Based on the transformation of a caterpillar to a butterfly, by spending time in a cocoon or chrysalis. This is a three day camp where young people are immersed in God's love, having to rely on others for everything, and so learning to let go of there lives. It is a time to truly experience that God is love, and a time to grow closer to God through study. Surrounded by an international community of prayer, the caterpillars are so soaked in prayer that it is surprising we do not end up saturated. That community offers support beyond the three day walk, allowing the butterflies who emerge to grow further in relationship with one another and Christ.
On this weekend I discovered that I am not as alone in my situation as I have often felt. I have met others who are in the same kind of place as me, and who are the same kind of age as me. It is this that truly made Chrysalis for me. That sense of never actually being alone has touched many lives over the years, and this weekend people shared with us what it meant to them, so inspiring us to share with others. I feel that I did indeed grow in my journey with Christ, and in the spirit of the title of this blog, I think I can share that I felt that two things I really needed to leave at the cross with Jesus were my pride and my fear of rejection. How well I will do at actually leaving them behind me I do not know, but with Jesus I believe I can overcome then, and live my life more fully in the hands and plans of God.
For all I speak of the joy that Chrysalis was (and I loved every moment, even when tired) there is a problem. After any type of high, be it chemical, spiritual, or emotional, there will always come a crash. For me that came when I returned home, and started having to deal with real life again. Being sick, and completely losing my voice make small things seem worse. Trying to respond to all my email, and make sure that I don't miss anything important. Catching up to varsity stuff once again, after ignoring it for a while. Having administrative errors on my side, coming from past mistakes, and things being in my calendar wrongly. All of these things were no easier to deal with for having been connected solely to God over the weekend. But I rest assured in his love for me. That no matter how bad things may seem, in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.
I have been called. I'm not sure where yet, but God has a plan, and I want to follow that plan.
Tuesday, 21 August 2012
Defense vs offence
Over the past few months and weeks, I have come across many different place where I am being challenged in my faith. People asking me why I believe in God. Is there really a God? It came to a bit of a head a few days ago when I was reading the comments on an atheist blog attacking C.S. Lewis for a single statement he made.
What depressed me when reading that, was not the points brought forward, but rather the way in which the author argued her points. Sure, there is space for discussion on whether or not there is a God, but if you are going to debate, please apply logic. Perhaps my perception of logic is slightly skewed, by being a Computer Scientist, and I like cold hard irrefutable facts, but arguments should be full, and refute all points made.
I have seen lots of bad arguments, both for and against Christianity, but seriously, they don't seem to hold water either way. The only way to prove something is to begin with an irrefutable fact. Something that everyone agrees is fundamental to life, the universe and everything. A statement of fact that will be accepted by the strongest naturalist, the most unbelieving atheist, and also the strongest, most evangelical Christian.
The argument must then build on this fact. finding possible reasons for it, and developing them until a contradiction is reached, or the are definitely still right. The proof by contradiction, is possibly one of the simplest forms of mathematical proof to understand. It is fundamentally easy to understand when you form a contradiction, so we can take our fact, and list a few possible reasons for it. We can then extrapolate from there until we reach a decision. Either what we are postulating is valid, or we will reach a contradiction, an have to return to our last correct point.
This process can be used all the way upwards until we reach an agreement, and a decision is made. I will not say now, that the decision will be either one way or the other, because then I would have to fully flesh out the argument, and that is a post in its own right. Instead I will say, if you want to argue, at least argue in a logically sound manner.
That is the offence side of the story. If you want to correctly defend your stand point, the laws of logic should still hold. You should still not argue with logical fallacies. And should argue against every point raised. It is no use when debating a point to allow emotions to cloud your judgement. Arguments should be clear and concise, and not attack the character of the person against whom you are arguing.
It is not useful to hurt the person you are arguing with, or to ignore points they put forward. It does not help to slander people in any way, unless you do not actually want your arguments to be taken seriously.
What depressed me when reading that, was not the points brought forward, but rather the way in which the author argued her points. Sure, there is space for discussion on whether or not there is a God, but if you are going to debate, please apply logic. Perhaps my perception of logic is slightly skewed, by being a Computer Scientist, and I like cold hard irrefutable facts, but arguments should be full, and refute all points made.
I have seen lots of bad arguments, both for and against Christianity, but seriously, they don't seem to hold water either way. The only way to prove something is to begin with an irrefutable fact. Something that everyone agrees is fundamental to life, the universe and everything. A statement of fact that will be accepted by the strongest naturalist, the most unbelieving atheist, and also the strongest, most evangelical Christian.
The argument must then build on this fact. finding possible reasons for it, and developing them until a contradiction is reached, or the are definitely still right. The proof by contradiction, is possibly one of the simplest forms of mathematical proof to understand. It is fundamentally easy to understand when you form a contradiction, so we can take our fact, and list a few possible reasons for it. We can then extrapolate from there until we reach a decision. Either what we are postulating is valid, or we will reach a contradiction, an have to return to our last correct point.
This process can be used all the way upwards until we reach an agreement, and a decision is made. I will not say now, that the decision will be either one way or the other, because then I would have to fully flesh out the argument, and that is a post in its own right. Instead I will say, if you want to argue, at least argue in a logically sound manner.
That is the offence side of the story. If you want to correctly defend your stand point, the laws of logic should still hold. You should still not argue with logical fallacies. And should argue against every point raised. It is no use when debating a point to allow emotions to cloud your judgement. Arguments should be clear and concise, and not attack the character of the person against whom you are arguing.
It is not useful to hurt the person you are arguing with, or to ignore points they put forward. It does not help to slander people in any way, unless you do not actually want your arguments to be taken seriously.
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